Things I Know

There are things I know,
things that I’m scared to say.
Not dark things, not really.

But too dark to admit except
in the dead of night
when only the moon and the stars can hear me.

Like I don’t want to die.
And I’m not as clever as people think.
But worst of all –
worse not because of what it is
but because of what comes with it –
I still love you.

More than my mortality scares me
or my ignorance annoys me.
More than I hate my body sometimes
and wish that I was someone else.
I love you.

And I’m scared to be without you.
Especially if it’s forever.

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