Dear Miss Jones

Dear Miss Jones, I’m writing to say
that I’m sorry there’s been a delay
in fulfilling your wish. The truth is
that we’re quite behind, and
all good wishes are hard to find.
I’m sure that you understand,
especially since your wish was so extensive,
and raw materials have become expensive.
There’s a recession on and half the market’s gone.

But there’s no room for excuses, we know,
They’re no use to you, and so,
here’s what we’re going to do:
instead of making you as pretty as a film star,
Getting you a new job and a better car,
plus, finding you someone to trust and to love,
we’ll consolidate all the above into one single service.

Now, there’s no need to be nervous,
we guarantee satisfaction
and other customers have seen the attraction.
This service is called Open Eyes.
It’s perfect for the demise of thoughts that lead you
to despair, prayer, and pulling out your hair.
It is subtly designed not to draw attention,
and the way it works is by darkness suspension.

Put simply, Miss Jones, it will show you
the thoughts of the people who know you
and think you’re already beautiful,
inside and out. It’ll leave you in no doubt
of your self worth and self respect as it will correct
the problems you’ve been having at source
and set you on a new course.

You’ll soon find new transport and employment
and your life will yield greater enjoyment.
All this will affect your heart; you may start
to find that you’re invited for a drink
by men who all will be delighted by your company.
And in time you’ll come to think
“This one is the one for me”. He’ll be
attractive and clever and love you
forever and ever.

So I hope this letter makes you feel better
and we’ll have your order out just as soon as we’re able.
Any questions drop us a cable via the well or the fountain with fishes
Your sincerely, Mike Bierley, Department of Wishes.
 

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